Remember when you first realized you need ‘something more to offer’ when friends are at a hard time ? I remember well. I felt empty that I didn’t have deeper compassion for a grieving neighbor at a time of traumatic loss in the family. It was time to turn off the entertainment and read.

Here is a nice starter list for you to develop deeper empathy and your loved one. I especially like C S Lewis books. He experienced an early loss of a spouse married late in life, a compassionate deep thinker who is easy to follow.

http://www.recover-from-grief.com/grief-and-loss-books.html

I guess the ever growing family counseling library I have is why I’ll sometimes call myself ‘your financial therapist’. If a loss was yours, “….what you are feeling is normal, and you are not alone.”

Let Me Share A Secret.

Just read a post about ‘The secret life of Realtor Referrals’. It was something like: ‘oh let me “help” you…you’ll get nothing and I get $$!’ kind of an article.

Phooey to that noise. It didn’t, so we shall, discuss ‘the better way‘.

Here’s MY Secret:

When using the referral process, ask:

1. What will YOU get/give ?
2. What will I get/give?
3. What will THEY get/give?

There should be an obvious ‘WIN/ WIN’ situation, or move on.

For 3 decades my philosophy has always been, if I can’t get for you more than what I get in return, I have nothing to offer – have a good day.

• A typical broker/agent has no mechanism in place to assist you in the referral/ relocation process, except what they’ll get financially from another office.
• Further, and what the article skipped over, is the ‘relocation companies’ as well as sites like ‘Estately’. These tend to be mechanisms to, for example, simply grab front page search results and sell the leads to agents. Zillow, Adwerx, and Trulia do similar things but in a ‘flat up front fee’ way.
• Franchise offices ? Here you get a referral from something more akin to an AutoZone auto parts store sending you to another AutoZone. Fine for auto parts. (Our local NON-FRANCHISE auto parts store actually suggests referrals to shops they have no affiliation with! Yeah !) Again, its often a ‘no services added’ fee. Just keeping the profits in-house, right?

How do you suppose these scenarios affect the transaction without producing a better result ? Well, the brokers/agents I speak with usually have the ‘I pay them X% for what?!!!’ The broker/agents that do take referrals tend to place the lead & client in a lower service level than organically derived customers.

Here’s my detailed secret, via http://AllOverUSA.com (yes, a shameless sell), I offer the upfront ‘ugly’ work that should be done by BOTH the person(s) being referred, and the brokerage/agent that will be on the ‘short list’ given to my customer/client that I’m working to forward a file with. Yessir, service for expected fee – novel eh? A buyer/seller needs to be ‘hardened off’ into reality – no agent likes this up front aspect of the realty experience. Further, agents should be screened….drilled and grilled AND be held accountable thereafter. Accountable is of value we the referral comes from a fellow pro much more so then if it comes from your friend or neighbor – after all, will it matter to the agency on receiving end vs. the result will matter A LOT to both the forwarding agency (in this case US), AND the receiving real estate agency.

So what’s my best sell when someone says ‘well, I can just do it myself and save’. Not really, there is NO cost to my clients getting referred and there can be maaaany rewards. AND, yes indeed, I have multiple times used other offices services in the same way I tell clients to use mine – all for the same reasons ! We used to call that “Practice What You Preach”.

All of my LinkedIn articles:

• https://www.linkedin.com/today/author/0_2Mv79slOdjpiHPphapp1G5